The author proposes that a new way of treating other people—women, the elderly, children, those of a different race, cultural tradition, ethnic origin, or belief—should be taught in homes, schools, in community and political activities, and every other place where social intercourse takes place. The most important site of education is the family, however it may be structured. Children are born with a need to learn almost everything they will need to cope with the elements and with society—what is appropriate and what is not, how and who to obey, how to think about solutions to problems, and especially how to interact peaceably and respectfully with other people. Across every culture, there are principles that can be taught that will take a child and mold him or her into a responsible, effective, self-sustaining, and socially successful adult. Even adults can learn a new paradigm, one that can take them out of abuse and into a cordial atmosphere.

Here are some rules that should be worthwhile:

1. Remember the importance of little things—courtesies, nuances of speech, elements of respect, trust, and acceptance.
2. In relationships with other people, develop—empathy [the capacity for participation in another’s feelings or ideas]; compassion [sympathetic consciousness of an another’s distress with a desire to alleviate that distress]; sensitivity [awareness of the needs and emotions of others, development of the ability to recognize common feelings, whatever effects one similarly affects the other. The elements of empathy, sympathy, and sensitivity include a sense of unity, harmony, and an inclination to think and feel alike, to be in accord, to have mutual loyalty with a pronounced tendency to favor or to support each other; acceptance [giving admittance into the social group or coupling, approval, to receive favorably and at best, without reservation or conditions]. Stephen R. Covey contributed poetic prose on the desirability of having sensitivity to what is being communicated. “Please hear what I am no saying. Don’t be fooled by the mask I wear. My surface may be smooth; it is a mask. Pleas listen carefully what I cannot say but is critical for me to say. It is important that I know you care, that you can beat down the walls I have erected, but gently, for I am a child.”; understanding [friendly and harmonious relationships, agreement of opinion or feelings, toleration, willingness to adjust differences without acrimony, judgment, or blaming; affection [tender attachment, fondness, partiality, propensity towards the other, warm regard—expressed verbally and in actions]. Continue reading →